Every Thursday, Earl Sleek will conspire with his pen and scanner to bring you another installment of PuckToons. Hopefully you will find these amusing, relevant, well-drawn, or you're a person who is tolerant towards mediocrity.

There certainly has been a lot of strange salary cap-related moves in the last few days around the league, particularly in the Pacific Division. Players have been waived, demoted, and even promoted in order to maximize spending under this year's $56.7 million cap ceiling.

In San Jose, defenseman Kyle McLaren was sent through waivers in an attempt to have his $2.5 million claimed by another team, but since nobody grabbed him, McLaren was demoted to the AHL Worcester affiliate. It's not an ideal solution for the team or the player, but it does at least allow the Sharks to begin the season below the salary ceiling. In Dallas, promising youngsters James Neal and Mark Fistric were demoted to the Central Hockey League's Oklahoma City Blazers, but then were recalled the following day to take advantage of Sergei Zubov's long-term injury. Anaheim went through most of its salary-shedding a few weeks ago, with the waiving then trading of defenseman Mathieu Schneider, the demotion of Bobby Ryan, and the trading of defenseman Sean O'Donnell. On top of that, the Ducks promoted goaltender David LeNeveu just for a day to take full advantage of the long-term injury exception.

On the other end of the salary spectrum, the Los Angeles Kings' GM Dean Lombardi and forward Patrick O'Sullivan finally finished their contract negotiations, and Lombardi's stubbornness appears to have paid off, as O'Sullivan signed a very affordable 3-year deal. With the signing, Los Angeles should be comfortably above the salary cap floor, though it still looks to be a tough year for the low-spending Kings. With all the promotions, demotions, trades, and signings of the last few days, one thing is clear: the salary cap is changing the way hockey teams operate in dramatic ways, and it's becoming tough for even hardcore fans to understand what their teams are up to. Regardless of silly salary cap math, though, the North American NHL season begins tonight! Hooray!

Welcome to the NHL FanHouse 2008-09 season preview. While other sites are previewing "30 teams in 30 days," we decided to take advantage of the extra time off before the start of the season to bring you all 30 previews over the next three weeks. We're counting down in reverse order of finish from last season in each conference every weekday from now until October 3. Look for an Eastern Conference preview every morning and a Western Conference preview every afternoon. Click here to read them all.

Who's In: Brendan Morrison, C (FA-VAN); Steve Montador, D (FA-FLA); Ken Klee (Trade-ATL)

Who's Out: Mathieu Schneider (Trade-ATL); Todd Bertuzzi, W (Bought out-CGY); Doug Weight, C (FA-NYI)

What's Changed: Nobody is semi-retired! Last year's drama surrounding the prolonged incecisions of Scott Niedermayer and Teemu Selanne have been put to rest, but not without salary cap repercussions. Last week, defenseman Mathieu Schneider, who the Ducks signed last summer to replace Niedermayer's minutes, was traded in a salary-dump move to the Atlanta Thrashers for Ken Klee and some bodies. Since then, loyal Finn Teemu Selanne inked a two-year contract, meaning the Ducks will still need to shed some more salary before opening day.

What's lost in some of this salary cap shuffle, though, is how the resulting roster resembles the 2007 cup-winning team. Substitute Brendan Morrison and Bobby Ryan in for Andy McDonald and Dustin Penner. Substitute Steve Montador in for Joe Dipenta, and backup goalie Jonas Hiller for Ilya Bryzgalov. Those are basically the differences; the rest of the team is intact, at least for the short-term future. With more than half the roster's contracts set to expire next summer, can the Ducks capture the fire from two years ago, or is it a team that has passed its peak?

Every Thursday, Earl Sleek will conspire with his pen and scanner to bring you another installment of PuckToons. Hopefully you will find these amusing, relevant, well-drawn, or you're a person who is tolerant towards mediocrity.

With NHL training camps opening up in little more than a week, a few teams are still looking to shed salary to get under the $56.7 million cap. A week ago, Dan Wood of the OC Register Duck's Blog posted a list of overcommitted teams, which includes the Anaheim Ducks, the Calgary Flames, Chicago Blackhawks, Philadelphia Flyers, San Jose Sharks and Washington Capitals. "The amounts in question range from a few hundred thousand dollars to as much as $4.5 million."

Now I'm not really an expert on the CBA and the salary cap, which is entering its fourth season in the league (don't turn to your cartoonist for technicalities), but I do know there is a Long-Term Injury allowance that lets teams temporarily outspend the salary cap while a player is unable to dress.

While I fully expect that the teams in question this summer will fix their salary issues through traditional means (trades and expensive demotions), I do wonder what the future has in store for spend-happy general managers. Will they ever get to the point where a budget-dictated surgery becomes a cap-cheating strategy? It's unlikely, I suppose, but if it ever does happen, I hope they'll now cut me in on the cap savings.

As late as just a couple of hours ago, it appeared that the legal troubles of Anaheim Ducks owner Henry Samueli were over. It was a couple of months ago that Samueli had worked out a plea agreement with Federal prosecutors where he would serve five years probation and pay over $12 million in fines for admitting to lying to SEC investigators who were probing his involvement in backdating stock options at Broadcom, a company he co-founded. All that was needed was for the judge to sign off on the agreement, and Samueli's troubles would be behind him.

But the judge isn't cooperating. Here's what U.S. District Judge Cormac J. Carney wrote in the decision that he handed down today (PDF):

While the USAO and Dr. Samueli have stipulated to what they believe is the appropriate sentence in this case, the Court has an independent obligation to ensure that the stipulated sentence is fair, appropriate and in the interest of justice. Regrettably, the parties' proposed sentence falls short of this standard. The government has publicly levied very serious allegations of securities fraud against Dr. Samueli that, if true, warrant a significant prison sentence.

Ouch. But wait, there's more, and it gets worse.

Every Thursday, Earl Sleek will conspire with his pen and scanner to bring you another installment of PuckToons. Hopefully you will find these amusing, relevant, well-drawn, or you're a person who is tolerant towards mediocrity.

I was inspired by this week's column by the Globe and Mail's Eric Duhatschek that contemplated the short-term future of the members of the 4-S Club: Joe Sakic, Brendan Shanahan, Teemu Selanne, and Mats Sundin. All four remain unrestricted free agents that for various reasons have not signed for the coming season and may even end up hanging up their skates and retiring from the NHL.

These four superstars have been lighting up the league for the greater part of two decades, combining for 5,225 regular season games played, 2,380 goals scored, and 5,448 points. All are among the top 50 point-scorers and the top 25 goal-scorers in NHL history, and are members of the exclusive 500 goal club and the 1,000 point club. Collectively, it's not like their game has slowed down considerably, either. If you tallied all their seasons before the 2004-05 lockout and pro-rated the results to an 82-game schedule, the pre-lockout 4-S Club averages 38 goals, 48 assists, 86 points. If you did the same exercise with the same group's post-lockout results, the foursome averages 36 goals, 48 assists, 84 points. Not a noticeable drop-off at all.

I don't know who among that group has really played their last NHL game, but it would be stunning if all four heroes rode off into the sunset together. After the break, I'll point out where these 4-S members stand on the all-time and active scoring lists, thanks to the resources at Hockey-Reference.com.

Every Thursday, Earl Sleek will conspire with his pen and scanner to bring you another installment of PuckToons. Hopefully you will find these amusing, relevant, well-drawn, or you're a person who is tolerant towards mediocrity.

Sorry I've been away for a few weeks. I've recently devoted my nights and weekends to moving to a new house.

At any rate, this week's PuckToon doesn't have to do with actual trade news, but rather a built-up speculation that's been building around the Anaheim Ducks and defenseman Mathieu Schneider. The Orange County Register's Dan Wood summarizes the Ducks' current salary cap dilemma and its apparent solution: "Signed as a free agent by the Ducks in 2007, when it appeared that Scott Niedermayer was bound for retirement, Schneider is now the most likely candidate to be sacrificed as the club must cut payroll to get beneath the NHL's $56.7 million salary cap for 2008-09." As Woods notes, though, the Schneider situation probably won't get resolved until teams know if or where Mats Sundin will sign.

The unfortunate aspect of needing to move Schneider and his $5.625 M cap hit is that the defenseman did nothing wrong on the ice last year. He was a top-20 scorer among defensemen, with 39 points in 65 games, and even earned a few Norris Trophy votes. However, even with Schneider's strong play, once Scott Niedermayer decided to return to the team, Schneidermayer's salary became too much for Anaheim's third-highest-paid defenseman.

Besides, there are still rumors in Anaheim that Teemu Selanne will return for another season, and the Ducks will need some freed up cap room for that signing. The OC Register's Randy Youngman points out a hilarious posting from Steven on bleacherreport.com: "My best friend's neighbor, who cleans the house two streets over from Teemu's house in OC, told me that the lady across the street is telling her mother that Teemu's wife is sharing with her friends that Teemu wants to play in Anaheim. It's solid info."

Whatever happens with Teemu, it's still a certainty that the Ducks need to ditch salary, even if it means trading away a solid performer like Schneider. As the cartoon implies, the break-up actually has very little to do with Schneider the player, but rather it's a result of the Niedermayer situation. It's an unfortunate situation for Schneider for sure, but this scenario was a very distinct possibility when he signed in Anaheim last summer.

Every Thursday, Earl Sleek will conspire with his pen and scanner to bring you another installment of PuckToons. Hopefully you will find these amusing, relevant, well-drawn, or you're a person who is tolerant towards mediocrity.

The Anaheim Ducks announced a two year extension for head coach Randy Carlyle yesterday, though the OC Register Ducks blog notes that the documents were actually signed seven weeks ago. Carlyle has been the head coach for the Ducks the past three seasons under GM Brian Burke, and has quickly become the most successful coach in the team's history, qualifying for the postseason each year and leading the Ducks to their first Stanley Cup Championship in 2007.

Over at Battle of California, I wrote a post about Carlyle's extension and noted that I have some difficulty expressing the strategic nuances that have made him successful. Still, there's one aspect I can appreciate: Carlyle's constantly grumpy expression. Smiles certainly don't come naturally to the former Norris Trophy winner, and considering the team's success, perhaps that stern countenance contributes to his players' performance.

However he gets his results, I am excited as a Ducks fan for two more years of Carlyle's frowns. Stay grumpy, dude.

With Iowa's AHL franchise now serving the Anaheim Ducks instead of the Dallas Stars, a new name change and uniform design was in order.

Instead of opting to go the easy route and become the Iowa Ducks or Iowa Mallards, the team went in a completely different direction and chose a baffling new name: The Iowa Chops.

"We really feel this name perfectly represents our vision of the new team," says team owner Kirby Schlegel. "It illustrates Iowa's agricultural heritage while also playing into the definition of 'chops', having nerve, resilience and staying power. The word 'chops' can mean continually defeating someone, and that is the reputation we expect Iowa's new team to gain in the league."

"We wanted a name that would catch people's attention and spark discussion, not just in Iowa but nationally as well," says Steve Nitzel, Iowa Chops President. "There is no doubt the name is unique. We're confident that the team will continue to gain respect in this community and in the league for years to come."

Well, the new name certainly captures your attention, much like the play-on-words Macon Whoopee once did.

That said, does anyone not think of delicious pork chops when they hear this name? Looking at the logo, I suddenly get the urge to fire up the BBQ. I can't help but think the Anaheim Ducks ought to change their name to the Peking Ducks. Then, the whole organization can be one delicious supper.

At the very least, the name and logo change has the fans talking, and given Iowan hockey a bit more of the mid-west sports spotlight.

Sith Lord Gary Bettman, the killjoy that he is, has apparently had enough of the public bickering between Brian Burke and Kevin Lowe and told both men/boys to STFU.

Playing the role of School Marm, Bettman had a teleconference with the aforementioned GMs, and let them know that their insults are 'tarnishing' the league.

Despite my assertion that Burke/Lowe are acting like little children, I agree with The Hockey News' Adam Proteau in that the league shouldn't be trying to put a halt to this petty feud. It makes for great press!

It doesn't matter whether you believe Burke's notion that Lowe single-handedly drove up player costs with his lucrative offers to other teams' restricted free agents, or Lowe's assertion that Burke is "an absolute media junkie" who deserves little credit for building the Ducks into a Stanley Cup champion.

What matters here is people are talking about hockey in July – and, most importantly, the next time the Ducks and Oilers play, there will be a huge buildup of hype and anticipation regarding what the next chapter of the dueling GMs will read like.

Yes, Monsieur Bettman, what hockey needs is LESS press coverage, not more.

Sure, the feuding looks unprofessional, but the NHL is in the business of providing entertainment. When there are no games on TV, why not let fans get their hockey fix through other means?

Ever since Kevin Lowe signed Dustin Penner to an obscenely large offer sheet last summer, Ducks GM Brian Burke has rarely seized an opportunity to rip into one of the league's worst managers.

Via bad trades, draft picks, and plain stupid signings, Kevin Lowe turned a surprising cup contender into a playoff no-show in the manner of a couple of months. Thus, he makes an easy target.

Well, after letting most of Burke's attacks slide, Lowe finally snapped and decided to respond to Burke's jabs with a few right hooks of his own.

"The guy is an absolute media junkie and I guess he's achieving what he wants because he gets his name in the headlines. But the reality is, I hate the fact that my name is linked to this."

"He won a Stanley Cup? Great. I've won six Stanley Cups, you want to count rings? Who cares? It's just a little pathetic that he carries on."

"He's a moron, first of all. Secondly, he really believes that any news for the NHL is good news. Thirdly, he loves the limelight and I don't think anyone in hockey will dispute that."

It's hard to argue with Lowe on this one. Brian Burke has rarely met a microphone or TV camera he didn't love, and has, in a rather immature manner, continued to attack Lowe long after the silly Penner signing went down.

What part of "let it go" does Brian Burke not understand? Hey, I love his tirades, but there comes a point where it just becomes childish.

Of course, we now eagerly await Burke's fiery response ;) ...